A Novel Approach to Excellence
When you grow up in a small town, it's easy to assume you're above average. I grew up in a place reminiscent of a Norman Rockwell painting. My hometown is nestled in the Finger Lakes of upstate New York - population: 3,626.
Before I was old enough to ride without training wheels, I remember my parents telling me I was smart. I have vague memories of reading books before I began kindergarten. I can clearly picture evenings at the dining room table learning my times tables on a toy cash register with my dad. I also remember relatives talking about free rides to college - all because I was a smart kid.
These predictions played out to an extent. I graduated salutatorian of my high school class and received a good, although not full, scholarship to a private college. At the exact intersection of my tiny hometown and academic ability, I was above average. This life experience primed me to believe I was exceptional, a dangerous default mindset.
While my parents helped me believe I was a cut above, they also taught me the value of hard work. I always had chores as a child - nothing extreme, but tasks I was responsible for, nonetheless. The chores I remember vividly are loading the dishwasher and feeding the dogs. These were simple tasks, but they taught me the necessity of doing things you don't like.
I hated loading the dishwasher because I hated touching dirty plates. The thought of somebody else's slimy scraps making the slightest contact with my fingers turned my stomach. Feeding the dogs could be equally unpleasant. Our dogs lived in a kennel more than a stone’s throw from the house. If I dawdled in my dog feeding duty, the sun would set before the dogs had dinner. My parents still made me trek up the hill to finish my chores, flashlight in hand, peering cautiously back and forth for monsters like a scared soldier keeping watch.
Those chores taught me discipline. Discipline helped me build upon natural ability.
In one of Ben Bergeron’s best podcast episodes, he discusses how most people would prefer to be a stud with God given talent rather than the guy who works harder than everyone else. But God given talent alone doesn't lead to long term success. When you’re naturally talented, it's easy to assume you're above average, and in a small population, you might be. Unless you create the habits to build success in the long term, you'll quickly drown in mediocrity as soon as you face true competition.
As an antidote to god given talent, Derek Sivers writes about a counterintuitive but valuable approach to life. He assumes he's below average at everything.
Coincidentally, I headed to college less than two months after Derek Sivers wrote about his below average approach, but I didn't come across the article for almost ten years. I approached college with a similar below average mindset, but I never thought of it that way until I recently read Sivers' article.
College, I knew, would be more challenging than high school the same way cooking truffle mac and cheese is more challenging than microwaving easy mac. They're the same general idea, but the necessary skills vary greatly.
In high school, I rarely had to exert myself mentally. I figured college would require more work, so I applied the discipline learned during childhood and did the simple things many college students don't. I attended every class. I often sat in the front. I read most of the assigned reading, and I set aside specific time to study. I started big assignments long before they were due. I never pulled an all-nighter. Without realizing it, I operated under the assumption that I was below average.
Three years later, I graduated with a bachelor's degree and a 3.98 GPA. I finished a year before most of my peers, and I was named student of the year in my major. I completed college well above average because I began by assuming I was below average. Starting with that assumption, like Sivers suggested, set me up for success.
"It serves me well," writes Sivers. "I listen more. I ask a lot of questions. I’ve stopped thinking others are stupid. I assume most people are smarter than me."
If you assume your classmates are smarter, you'll have to study more to keep pace.
If you assume your co-workers are more competent, you'll have to make sure you do the little things to set you apart (show up early, don't make excuses, proofread your emails, etc.).
If you assume your teammates are stronger, you'll spend extra time in the weight room.
By assuming you're below average, you work harder on everything, you control the things you can control, and you approach all situations with humility. Paradoxically, by adopting this mindset, you'll probably perform above average. People will want to work with you, doors will open, and you’ll be well on your way to excellence.
